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There are two main reasons why men avoid online dating. First, is because of their lack of patience, and second is the stigma that it’ll bring them. Simply put, they are afraid of what others will think of them when it gets out that they’ve been relying on online dating to find a girlfriend or lover.
Success in online dating depends on your patience. First you have to build a profile that’ll catch the attention of the girls, and second, you have to be “picky” about the girls you’ll choose. Again, patience is the key. You have to invest time in building the right profile and be selective on which women to pursue. The best way is to make your profile attract the correct kind of girls, but until you have mastered the art of online dating, you have to stick to the two-step process– attract a girl and see if she’s the one for you.
Attracting the girl – Attracting a girl is quite easy if you have the looks, but if you’re not that lucky in that department, it does not mean that you won’t get any form of interest from the female population. It just means that you have to work twice as hard– and the notion of working twice as hard is what gets men abandoning their profile! Guiding your profile from a position of confidence and authority will be key. You have to take the position that you know what you want and you know what you don’t want. Women like men that are a little bit bold. This boldness must be conveyed in your profile and this will get attention from the ladies.
Seeing if the girl is right for you – Now, this is the hardest part. Say you’ve got three ladies sending you emails and all of them are pretty and all of them pass the preliminary criteria you have in mind (education, work, hobbies, etc). The next step is to know which of them has the personality that will match your own. How will you do that… online? Of course you’ll have to meet them, spend time with them, see if it will work. That of course will cost you time, money, and effort. And you will have to do that with all three of the girls! What if there were five? If the first girl you meet is really nice, you cannot help but think: what if the second one is better? Or maybe the third one is “the one”?
That’s why it is important to know the correct ways of “knowing the girl” without actually meeting her first. You can do that by polishing your profile and by using the correct approaches. Both of these will be discussed in the later chapters.
The social stigma is another issue. Friends may accept that you to use online dating to get laid. However, if they find out that you are looking for a serious relationship, they may start look to question your manhood. For them it means you are “not good enough” to meet women in real life so you are reduced to finding one online. It’s a very harsh statement, but it is also very untrue. So how will you handle it when your friends keep on looking down on you? Follow these tips: Let them be – The idea that you are searching for women using an online dating site will cause a brief ripple from them, but it won’t last. Come to think of it, it’s not as if you’re trying to date a virtual girl– as much as you exist in this world, she does too. So, you’re not insane– no need to fuel the fire by being defensive.
If they hassle you too much – If they provoke you too much, show them some of the girls you met online. Tell them something about these women. This may make them realize the reality of your online dating experiences- which are real. These are real women and they are really easy to meet. Who knows, they might even be encouraged to try it for themselves, especially if they are single! If you build the right profile and use online dating sites as I instruct you to do, they will ultimately be envious of you.
Use your best judgment – Share your online dating stories, but don’t share too often. Don’t fiddle with your smart phone or tablet every minute to check your emails while out with your friends! Let your friends know that online dating is something you do and have had success with. However, the more you “show off” your attachment to online dating, the more they will feel as though you are weird! It the end, if you are meeting quality women, that is all that matters.
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